How to Choose the Best Couples Therapy For You and Your Partner
Are you looking for the best couple therapy type that is suited for you? Relationships aren’t always sunshine and sweet texts. Even the strongest couples experience challenges at times. Perhaps you’re experiencing increased arguments, a sense of disconnection, or a lack of agreement.
Finding the best couples therapy can significantly transform your situation. But here’s the thing: not all therapy works the same for every couple. What works for one couple may not be effective for another. So how do you figure out what actually works for you and your partner?
In this guide, we’ll help you find a type of couples therapy that fits, feels right, and actually helps your relationship grow stronger.
What Makes Couples Therapy “Best” for You and Not Just in General
Relationships and therapy are not universally applicable. The most effective couples therapy doesn’t revolve around what’s currently trending online or what worked for your closest friend. It’s about what works for you and your partner.
Are you trying to rebuild trust after a rough patch? Or maybe you’re dealing with constant miscommunication, and you just want to feel heard again. Different goals call for different approaches.
Some couples need a therapist who helps them dig deep emotionally. Others prefer a more practical, action-based strategy. And for some, just having a safe space to talk (without it turning into World War III) is a giant win.
So before you jump into any sessions, consider stepping back and thinking:
- What do we want to get out of therapy?
- Do we want short-term tools or long-term healing?
- Are we open to digging into the past, or do we just want to fix what’s happening right now?
Understanding your goals significantly simplifies the process of selecting a therapy style and therapist that truly resonates with you. This is because finding the “best” is not about popularity but rather about finding a fit.
Different Types of Couples Therapy And Which Works Best for What
Now that you understand the importance of selecting the most suitable couples therapy for your specific circumstances, where do you begin? There are actually quite a few different styles of therapy out there. They’re all a little different.
Here’s a quick rundown of the most popular types and when each one actually makes sense to try:
- The Gottman Method
Do you desire enhanced communication and reduced arguments? This one’s a top pick. It’s all about helping couples build friendship, manage conflict, and create shared meaning. This program revitalises relationships by utilising proven techniques backed by numerous studies. It is best suited for couples who struggle with constant fighting or feel emotionally disconnected.
- Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
This therapy type focuses on the emotional bond between partners. It helps you feel safe, seen, and supported again, especially if things have felt distant or tense. This form of treatment is best for couples who’ve grown apart or are stuck in patterns of withdrawal or conflict.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
It is practical and straightforward. CBT helps you and your partner identify negative thoughts and behaviours and change them. It’s less about feelings and more about strategy. This therapy is best for couples dealing with specific problems like jealousy, trust issues, or parenting clashes.
- Imago Relationship Therapy
This therapy type is based on the idea that we’re attracted to people who reflect unresolved issues from our childhood. The therapy focuses on healing and growing together through deep empathy. This approach is best for couples willing to do inner work and explore past wounds.
- Solution-Focused Therapy
Short, sweet, and laser-focused on the future. Rather than rehashing the past, this approach helps couples find quick wins and create change fast. It is best for couples with a specific issue or goal who want results—like, yesterday.
Quick Comparison Snapshot
| Therapy Type | Great For… | Vibe |
| Gottman Method | Communication & trust issues | Structured & research-based |
| Emotionally Focused (EFT) | Emotional closeness & reconnection | Deep & healing |
| CBT | Problem-solving, thinking patterns | Logical & practical |
| Imago | Emotional wounds & childhood triggers | Reflective & intimate |
| Solution-Focused | Fast results, specific challenges | Goal-driven & brief |
Signs You and Your Partner Need Couples Therapy
You might be wondering, “Do we really need couples therapy, or is this just a rough patch?” This is a valid question. Many couples tend to wait until their situation deteriorates. It is important to seek assistance well before reaching your lowest point, as therapy is most effective when it begins early in the process.
Here are some signs that it may be time to find therapy for your relationship:
- You’re Having the Same Argument on Repeat
Does every conversation turn into a rerun of the same fight? Therapy can help break the negative loop you’re in.
- The Communication Feels Cold (or Nonexistent)
If your conversations feel more like awkward check-ins or complete silence, something’s off. Effective communication is crucial for the success of any relationship.
- Someone’s Holding Back or Shutting Down
Perhaps one of you tends to shy away from conflict, while the other is eager to discuss it immediately. That mismatch can lead to resentment fast.
- Trust Has Taken a Hit
Infidelity, dishonesty, and emotional distance all contribute to the fragility of trust. If it’s been broken, therapy can help rebuild it with the right tools.
- Everything Feels Like a Trigger
When seemingly insignificant events escalate into significant issues, it typically indicates the presence of underlying issues.
- You Feel More Like Roommates Than Partners
If the romance, intimacy, or emotional connection has faded, that’s not something you have to “just live with.”
You don’t wait for your car to completely break down before getting it checked. Getting support early can actually prevent bigger issues down the line. And even if things feel “fine,” there’s always room to grow, reconnect, and strengthen your bond.
How to Research and Find the Best Couples Therapy Provider
To actually find the best couples therapy out there is not just picking the first name that pops up on Google.
Finding the right therapist is kind of like dating. You want someone who “gets” you, understands your goals, and makes both you and your partner feel safe. So let’s break it down:
1. Start with a Therapist Directory
You need to search for therapist directories using terms like “best couples therapist near me,” “relationship counselling that actually works,” or “relationship counselling near me.”
2. Check Their Credentials
Look for licensed professionals—LMFTs (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists), LPCs, psychologists, or social workers with experience in couples work. Bonus points if they’re trained in a specific method like Gottman or EFT
3. Ask the Right Questions
You need to ask the right questions before you book. Most therapists offer free consultations. Use that time wisely and ask questions like
- Have you worked with couples in similar situations?
- What therapy style do you use, and why?
- How do you measure progress or success?
- Do you meet us together, separately, or both?
4. Decide: Online or In-Person?
Virtual therapy has become very popular now (thanks to Zoom), and for many couples, it is just as effective as in-office therapy. Apps like BetterHelp, Regain, and Talkspace offer easy access from home.
However, if you prefer in-person interactions, choosing local therapists may be a better option. Either way, what matters most is that both of you feel comfortable.
5. Read the Reviews
While reviews can provide a general impression, it is important to approach them with caution. Every couple’s experience is different. Instead, trust your instincts during the initial call or session. You want to know if you feel heard or if the vibe was right.
Quick Checklist to Keep You on Track:
- ✅ Licensed and experienced in couples therapy
- ✅ Offers therapy style that fits your goals
- ✅ Feels neutral, non-judgmental, and relatable
- ✅ Affordable or takes your insurance
- ✅ Good fit for both you and your partner
What to Expect from the Best Couples Therapy
Now it’s time to talk about money issues because even if you’ve found the best couples therapy, it’s got to be something you can actually afford.
One of the biggest reasons couples postpone seeking help is the cost. However, the good news is that therapy does not need to be prohibitively expensive. You may be surprised to find that there are cheaper couples therapy options, some of which may be covered by insurance.
1. How Much Does Couples Therapy Usually Cost?
On average, couples therapy sessions typically cost between $75 and $250 per hour, depending on your location and the therapist’s experience. In big cities, you should expect to pay on the higher end of the price range. Should you choose to opt for therapists in smaller towns or those who provide virtual-only services? It’s often cheaper.
If you’re doing online couples counselling, platforms like BetterHelp or Regain offer subscription-based plans that can be more budget-friendly, usually around $60–$90 per week.
2. Will Insurance Cover Couples Therapy?
This one’s a maybe, and it depends on your plan. Some insurance companies will cover relationship therapy, but usually only if it’s tied to a mental health diagnosis (like anxiety, depression, or PTSD). That said, it’s always worth calling your provider to ask specifically:
“Does my plan cover couples counselling or marriage counselling, and if so, what do I need to qualify ford to qualify for?”
3. Budget-Friendly Alternatives to Try
If traditional therapy’s too pricey, don’t give up just yet. Here are some low-cost or free ways to still get the help you need:
- Sliding Scale Therapists – Many therapists adjust their rates based on your income.
- Community Mental Health Centers – Some offer couples counseling at reduced fees.
- Non-Profit Organizations – Local relationship centres or churches may offer support groups or therapy sessions.
- University Clinics – Grad students in training (supervised) often provide therapy at very low rates.
- Therapy Apps – As mentioned earlier, services like Regain or Talkspace offer accessible, licensed relationship therapy online.
4. Don’t Let Cost Be the Dealbreaker
The best couples therapy is the one that assists you in reconnecting, healing, and moving forward, not the one with the most luxurious office or the highest price tag.
Therefore, even if your budget is limited, don’t rule out therapy. With a little digging, you can find quality relationship counseling that works for your life and wallet.
Success Stories That Prove the Best Couples Therapy Works
Are you still uncertain about the effectiveness of couples therapy? Many people worry they’ll invest the time, money, and energy and end up right back where they started.
But here’s the thing: when you find the best couples therapy for your situation, the results can be powerful and sometimes even life-changing.
Let’s examine several instances where effective relationship therapy resulted in positive outcomes:
Case #1: From Constant Fights to Clear Communication
Mike and Jasmine were experiencing extreme tension. Every conversation resulted in a confrontation. They were exhausted, harbouring resentment, and prepared to end their relationship. They tried the Gottman method and, with time, learnt how to actually listen instead of jumping into defence mode. Two months in, they weren’t just arguing less; they were enjoying each other again.
- The best couples therapy for them is the one focused on conflict resolution and emotional safety.
Case #2: Rebuilding Trust After Betrayal
Dan’s admission of an emotional affair brought Rita and Dan to their lowest point. Trust is completely gone. They chose Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to work through the pain and understand what led to the disconnect. It wasn’t easy, but over several months, they rebuilt their emotional bond, and eventually, trust followed.
- The best couples therapy in their case is one that allowed space for vulnerability and healing.
Case #3: Ending Things With Kindness
Not every couple walks away still together, and that’s okay. Sarah and Toni were dealing with years of quiet resentment. Through solution-focused therapy, they realized they were better apart. But instead of a messy split, therapy helped them part ways with respect and closure.
- The best couples therapy here is the one that helped them move forward, not just hold on.
What Do These Stories Have in Common?
Every couple entered therapy uncertain and a little sceptical. But with the right approach and a therapist who understood their needs, they found clarity, connection, and peace, whether that meant staying together or letting go.
The best couples therapy meets you where you are and helps you get to where you need to be.
Apps and Resources That Support the Best Couples Therapy
Therapy doesn’t stop when the session ends, and the best couples therapy includes tools you can use between appointments to keep the momentum going. Whether you’re working through deep issues or just want to strengthen your connection, there are tons of helpful resources out there.
Here are a few apps, books, and tools that can really support your relationship growth:
- Couple-Focused Apps Worth Trying
- Lasting
It is a research-based couples therapy app that features daily check-ins and bite-sized lessons based on science. It serves as a portable form of therapy.
➤ Great for: Communication, conflict, and emotional connection - Gottman Card Decks
Created by the Gottman Institute, this app gives you prompts and questions that help spark meaningful convos with your partner.
➤ Great for: Rebuilding closeness and learning to listen - Love Nudge
Based on the 5 Love Languages, this one helps you show love in the way your partner actually feels it.
➤ Great for: Everyday connection and intentionality
2. Books to Deepen Your Relationship Work
- “Hold Me Tight” by Dr. Sue Johnson
This book is essential for those undergoing Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). It’s all about building secure attachment. - “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by Drs. John and Julie Gottman
These principles come directly from the minds behind one of the most effective therapy methods available. - “Attached” by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
It aids in comprehending attachment styles and the reasons behind your and your partner’s reactions.
3. Mindfulness and Mental Wellness Tools
- Headspace or Calm
Managing your stress individually helps your relationship thrive too. These meditation apps are excellent for couples trying to stay grounded and present. - Joint Journaling Apps (like “Between”)
Share gratitude, notes, and reflections with each other privately—perfect for staying connected between sessions.
Pro Tip:
If you’re already in therapy, ask your therapist if they recommend any tools tailored to your goals. A good therapist won’t just give you insight; they’ll equip you with practical strategies to use in everyday life.
Even the best couples therapy isn’t magic. It’s about what you do with it that makes the difference.
Final Thoughts
Let’s acknowledge that no couple has perfected their relationship. Every relationship experiences highs and lows, and love occasionally requires some support. That’s where the best couples therapy comes in. It’s not about being broken; it’s about being brave enough to grow together.
Whether you’re stuck in a cycle of arguments, feeling distant, or just want to reconnect before things drift too far apart, there’s a type of therapy out there that fits you. And now, you’ve got the knowledge to actually go find it.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
❓ What is the best type of couples therapy?
There is no universally applicable solution. The best couples therapy depends on your specific relationship needs. For communication issues, the Gottman Method works well. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is frequently successful for fostering emotional intimacy. For trust and behaviour patterns, cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) may be helpful. Choose based on what you and your partner are struggling with most.
❓ Does couples therapy really work?
Yes, when both partners are committed, couples therapy is highly effective. Studies show that 70–90% of couples see improvements in communication, emotional connection, and conflict resolution. The key is finding the right therapist and therapy approach for your situation.
❓ How much does the best couples therapy cost?
Costs vary. In-person sessions usually range from $75 to $250 per hour. Online couples therapy platforms like Regain or BetterHelp can be more affordable, with weekly plans starting around $60–$90. Many therapists offer sliding scale pricing or accept insurance.
❓ Can couples therapy work if only one partner is willing?
Couples therapy works best when both partners are involved, but if only one is open to it, individual therapy can still help improve relationship dynamics. Sometimes, one partner starting the process encourages the other to join later.
❓ Is online couples therapy as effective as in-person?
Yes, online couples counseling has been shown to be just as effective as in-person sessions, especially when using licensed, experienced therapists. It also offers added convenience and flexibility for busy couples or long-distance relationships.
❓ How do I find the best couples therapist near me?
Start with trusted directories like Psychology Today, TherapyDen, or Zencare. Filter by license, speciality, location, and therapy style. Look for someone with experience in marriage counselling or relationship therapy, and don’t be afraid to schedule a free consultation before committing.
Footnotes & Sources
- Gottman Institute – The Gottman Method is based on over four decades of research into relationships and marriage stability.
🔗 https://www.gottman.com/about/research/ - American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) – Reports that over 97% of surveyed couples got the help they needed from couples therapy.
🔗 https://www.aamft.org - Dr Sue Johnson, Creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – Research has shown that 70–75% of couples move from distress to recovery using EFT.
🔗 https://iceeft.com/what-is-eft/ - APA (American Psychological Association) – Outlines the evidence and effectiveness behind various couples therapy modalities.
🔗 https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/11/couples - Journal of Marital and Family Therapy – Shows that couples therapy can significantly improve relationship satisfaction and individual mental health.
🔗 https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/journal/17520606 - BetterHelp / Regain – Popular online therapy platforms offering affordable couples counseling with licensed therapists.
🔗 https://www.regain.us
🔗 https://www.betterhelp.com - Psychology Today – Trusted directory for finding licensed therapists, including couples counselors in your area.
🔗 https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists - National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) – Provides insights on how therapy supports mental health and relationships.
🔗 https://www.nimh.nih.gov




